This Is The End
by liamdude5
Summary: Ratchet and Clank go to a party held by Star Fox. The rapture happens. Chaos ensues. Very loosely based on This Is The End. Rated T for drug and alcohol use, including underage drinking, and references, violence, possibly scary elements, language, and mild sexual situations and references.


_Guess where I am. I'm in Animal Kingdom. Three quick things._

_Number One: Oh yeah! I did it! I got this up before the end of March. Just under the wire, but I did it._

_Number Two: In terms of my other Fanfictions, I should hopefully have the next chapter of Sonic Meets Star Wars before the end of the day. Tomorrow for sure. As for my My Little Pony oneshot that takes place after My Little Pony In 30 Rock, well, I'm heading back home tomorrow, so I will try my best to finish it in the car and publish it when I get home._

_Number Three: Remember that the dedline for my poll on which movie I should review for my YouTube Channel is the end of March. If I don't get any votes like the last two times, I'm pushing back the poll until next year._

_So, for now, sit back and read my latest masterpiece._

The Great Fox was not The Great Fox tonight. Tonight, it was party central. It was the anniversary of Star Fox 64, so the Star Fox crew were having a party. You see, these aren't the Star Fox characters you know of. These are the actors who play those characters. So, not only are Fox, Falco, Peppy, Slippy, Krystal, and Rob 64 holding the party, but Wolf is as well. They parked the Great Fox on Corneria so guests could find the place. They invited not only Nintendo characters, but third party characters as well. And a few of those characters are from the series Ratchet And Clank. Nefarious and Qwark were already at the party, but Clank had arrived in Corneria before Ratchet and Ratchet was flying in to meet him. This was the first time Ratchet and Clank would see each other since they finished filming that Ratchet and Clank movie. In all honesty, Ratchet was a little nervous. Back before they filmed the first Ratchet and Clank game, Ratchet and Clank were really good friends. But, after they filmed the first game, they drifted apart a little because Ratchet let the fame he got after the first game was released go to his head. Then, as more games were released, they got more fame, Ratchet got more egotistical, and him and Clank saw less and less of each other. In fact, by the time All 4 One came out, Ratchet and Clank only saw each other when they filmed more games. And even then, they barley interacted. But, whenever Ratchet saw Clank, he felt guilty. He knew that he was neglecting his friend. He knew that he let the fame go to his head. And he knew that he had to do something to improve himself. But, then something would happen to make him forget that. Fans asking for autographs. Women throwing themselves at him. Getting booked on the Jimmy Fallon Show again. He didn't particularly like Jimmy Fallon, but he wasn't allowed on the Seth Meyers show anymore because he forgot how long commercial breaks are. Plus, he liked the attention. Ratchet didn't particularly feel good on the plane either. It was 12 hours for him to think about how much of a jerk he had been to Clank. Also, the fact that he just had a passionate make out session with a random flight attendant who's name he didn't even remember anymore in the bathroom while Clank hasn't even felt the touch of a woman besides Carly the production assistant who mikes him up in 10 years doesn't make him feel any better. While Ratchet just sat on the plane feeling like a jerk, Clank was sitting in the airport on Corneria that Ratchet's plane would land at in 6 hours. All Clank could think about was how this weekend could be the chance for him and Ratchet to renew their friendship, like how it was before they started acting in the Ratchet and Clank games. You see, Clank wasn't just planning on going to Star Fox's party. They would also see several sites throughout Corneria tomorrow and go to an air show the day after that. After that, Clank hoped that they would get on a plane back home together. As friends once again. Once Ratchet's plane landed, he was actually excited to see Clank. On the plane, Ratchet decided that this weekend would be a new start for him. An unselfish one. He wanted Clank to see this new side to him. After walking out of his terminal and to baggage claim, Ratchet looked around and say somebody holding a sign that said Ratchet. Ratchet saw it and waved. Then, the sign went away to reveal Clank. They walked towards each other and gave each other a hug. "Hey," Ratchet exclaimed. "Hey," Clank exclaimed. They then stopped hugging, "How was your flight?" "It was fine," Ratchet responded, "How was yours?" "Alright," Clank responded, "There Waa turbulence." "Oh," Ratchet exclaimed, "I'm sorry. Are you OK?" "I'm fine," Clank responded, "It was cool actually. I got scared and grabbed the passenger next to me, so I got the most action I've had in a month." "Good thing it wasn't a dude," Ratchet chuckled. "It was," Clank chuckled. "Ooh," Ratchet laughed, "Watch out ladies. It's brokeback mechanical." Ratchet and Clank then crack up. Then, a beautiful woman walked up to them. "Oh my gosh," the girl yelled, "Are you Ratchet from Ratchet And Clank?" Clank sighed in frustration. "Yes," Ratchet awkwardly said, "Yes I am." "Oh my gosh," the girl freaked out, "I have something for you." The girl reached inside of her purse and pulled out an envelope. "Read this after I leave," she said while she handed Ratchet the envelope. She then left and Ratchet opened the envelope to find a picture of the girl in Victoria's Secret underwear with writing on it. "Dear Ratchet/Hugh Jackman/Shaquielle O Neil," the writing said, "Nearest bathroom. Twenty minutes. No foreplay." Clank read over Ratchet's shoulder. "So," Clank sighed, "You gonna go do what you do with that girl?" "No," Ratchet reassuringly replied, "I won't. Well, no I won't. I'm here to see my little robot buddy and that's what I'll do." "Really," Clank asked. "Really," Ratchet reassured, "Now, why don't we head to the party?" "OK," Clank responded, "Sounds great." So, fighting off the surging levels of ecstasy coursing through his veins, Ratchet led Clank to a taxi and they went to the Great Fox for the party. About twenty minutes later, they arrived at the Great Fox. Ratchet knocked on the door and Marth from Fire Emblem answered. "Oh my gosh," Marth exclaimed, "It's robo Peter Dinklage and an Ewok. No way!" As that happens, Fox McCloud shows up and shoves a drunken Marth aside. "Hey guys," Fox greets, "Glad you could make it. Sorry about Marth. He's the drunk uncle of Nintendo. Come in." So, Fox McCloud led Ratchet and Clank inside. And what they found was madness. There were video game characters left and right acting like drunken idiots. Here are a few examples: Mario, Donkey Kong, and Kratos were sitting in a circle snorting Cocaine and other drugs and other things that aren't drugs, like ground up red mushrooms and stars. They were reminiscing about the days when Rare was still rockin' the Banjos and the Kazooies on the "Blintendo 64". Baby Luigi, Captain Falcon, and Master Chief put shaving cream on Link's hand, then tickled his face. Guess what happened next. Gannondorf was holding Chibi Robo while he puked outside of a window saying, "Maybe you really are underage. I thought robot years didn't matter." And those were just a few of the drunken acts committed. Ratchet and Clank awkwardly wandered through the Great Fox while Fox gave them a tour. "This is the party room," Fox showed, "The only rule here is don't be a fuddy duddy. This is the bathroom. Falco says not to open the third drawer under any circumstances. But, we never listen to a word he says, so go ahead and look if you want to. These are our bedrooms. Don't go in there. That's where we hide "things." That's the janitors closet. Miyamoto doesn't let us in there. And, finally, there's the control room. No matter what, never press the big red button. Well, I guess that's everywhere." They were back in the party room when Ratchet noticed something. "Hey," Ratchet noticed, "Isn't that Ness from Earthbound over there?" "Yes it is," Fox answered. "What's wrong with him," Clank asked. "Well," Fox replied, "What with having his career tanked since he hasn't been in anything other than Smash Bros since 1995, he developed a drinking problem." "That's terrible," Ratchet commented. As he spoke, Ness was approaching Lara Croft. "Hey baby," Ness flirted as he grabbed her butt, "You're finer than Zero Suit Samus." "Hey," Lara Croft exclaimed as she turned around, "Little creep!" Lara Croft then socked Ness right in the kisser. As that scene unfolded, Captain Qwark approached Ratchet, Clank, and Fox. "Hey little nerds," Captain Qwark drunkenly greeted. "Hey Captain Qwark," Ratchet greeted, "How's the party?" "It sucks now," Captain Qwark replied, "Fox is outta beer." "Outta beer," Fox exclaimed, "That's not good. I'll have to get some more. Ratchet and Clank. You guys haven't gotten comfortable yet. Mind going to a supermarket down the street and getting some more?" "Sure," Ratchet replied. "Of course," Clank answered. Secretly, the two were glad to get out of there. Fox's party was a step up from the usual parties they went to, which were polka festivals held by Chairman Drek. They weren't fun, but at least they weren't psycho like this. Anyways, at the gas station, Ratchet was trying to break the tension that came from them never hanging out anymore. "So," Ratchet started, "How's tricks?" "Good," Clank answered, "Good." "Say," Ratchet started, "Do you know that store down the street from your old house? Mattress Factory?" "No," Clank replied, "I don't know what you're talking about." "Mattress Warehouse," Ratchet asked. "I don't remember that," Clank replied. "Mattress Madhouse," Ratchet asked. "No," Clank replied. "Oh," Ratchet answered, "Well, the owner was murdered by a panda bear." "What," Clank exclaimed, "Why would you tell me that?" It was at that point that Ratchet stopped trying to break the tension. So, they bought the beer and left. But, a few minuted after they left, something strange started happening. The clouds in the sky were opening up. Ratchet and Clank were wondering what was up. Then, all at once, beams of light came shooting from the openings in the clouds. They enveloped certain people and they rose into the sky. Ratchet and Clank and the other people not being enveloped were panicking. They had no idea what was going on. Unfortunately, some of the people enveloped were driving vehicles. So, the uattended vehicles were careening out of control. One of them was heading straight for Ratchet and Clank.

_Well, tthat's all for now. Goodbye._


End file.
